Good Bye Pride Hello Reality

I didn't realize how much pride I really had until now. It took my pride being wounded for me to realize that I am only human. This past Friday I was let go from my job and although I don't agree with their reasonings the fact is the same I have to look for work again.

Getting let go on a Friday gives you a kind of twilight. It numbs you to the reality that awaits you on monday morning. And then comes Sunday night and it starts to seep in to your conscious that “hey, tomorrow your not going to work.” But it only hits you more permanently on Tuesday. Yes Tuesday. Why Tuesday? Because Monday no I’m not going to work but “I’m going to be able to find a job” or there’s the “I’m going to have a little time off and enjoy it and it cant be that bad.” 

Then you wake up Tuesday morning after spending a day relaxing, leisurely applying to jobs that sound cool and interesting.  Not that your not taking it seriously but the sense of urgency isn’t biting your ass. Then its Tuesday.

Tuesday is the day when everything sinks in or the depression sets in. Questions bubble in your head such as: Where did I go wrong? and How could I let this happen? Why didn’t I fight more? Am I a failure? Am I an idiot? It becomes to much to take all the while trying to keep your eye on the prize and looking for work, because if you don’t the bills won’t get paid.

Then there’s Wednesday. I woke up this morning and realized this is not going to happen over night. This is a process and I have to do everything I can but I can’t set my expectations high. Being positive is the best thing to do in this situation. Count your blessings and try and be best. This can and will be worse before they get better. Hope can be stronger than pride. 

Although my pride has been wounded and talking about it has been hard. Accepting reality is inevitable and needs to happen to learn and grow. This process is something that many seem to be going through and may vary from person to person. But we are all human and have the ability to learn grow and adapt. 

Life Change and New Career

Three days left at La-Z-Boy and I am feeling a little bittersweet. It has been a long a tedious three and half years filled with ups and downs. The joys are what I will bring with me and the rest I will leave behind. I have learned a great deal from my time but it is time to part ways.

Am I going in the right direction? Who knows. All I can do is try my best and roll with the punches. Of course I am filled with anxiety as I start out in a new direction, a field I know very little about, in a position I have never worked before. It will be a learning curve but it is worth it.

For the past 5 years I have been working a retail based schedule. Some people work this schedule all there lives and I commend them for their ability to handle it. The retail life is not for me though. It takes a lot of time away from family and friends and the strain on myself especially has been overwhelming and no longer tolerable. I value my time with my family and my new husband and the world I was working in before did not mesh with those values.

Now I will be working a 8-5 Monday thru Friday job that allows me to come home at a reasonable time at night, have weekends off and celebrate holidays with my family. It is not in my field but there are sacrifices we have to make to obtain the desired lifestyle we want. 

Now that I will not be tied to a company where I could not work on design project outside of my work you will be hearing more from me. I cannot give up design which leaves this blog as my main outlet for the time being. That being said, I would like to thank all of my readers for your patronage to my blog, and I hope you will continue to read and follow. I hope I can keep you interested and help you learn something new about the world of design.